This isn’t like any normal write-up or article you see around. I’m just going to be plain real about some stuff I see going around, then you can decide if you’re part of the cycle or not, warning, really it’s nothing serious, just trying to get some thoughts out, lol okay so I’d start with the definition of neediness.
Neediness is the quality of being in constant want, attention and affection and reassurance to a marked degree. It can also be seen as being overly attached to something or someone to the extent of not being able to be alone for a significant amount of time. A lot of people are needy and they do not know it, most individuals have become attached to something or someone unconsciously and when they realize it, it might be too late and it becomes very hard to detach. For the purpose of this write up, I’d be focusing being attached to a person. Well we’ve all had that one person we got attached to at some point in our lives, you know who! lol. And you can’t help it, you just want to be around them, you want talk all the time, text and all that and you’re just excited about how everything is going. The thing we often forget is people get tired, it’s just like having the same meal everyday and for a while you think that was all you needed then you get a taste of something better you end up realizing that you limited yourself to just one thing which is not in any way tasteful compared to your ‘’newly found meal’’. So the day either party finds out that just one type of meal everyday isn’t what they need, they begin to withdraw gradually, some abruptly without warning. People say you don’t know what you need until you see it? I don’t know how true that is but let’s go on. So when one party begins to drift that’s when you discover just how attached you’ve become and that is a great problem. A normal ‘’hey’’ you’d send without thinking twice about, you begin to ponder on it for minutes. Writes ’hi’’ erase ‘heyy’ erase lol smh been there. Why do we do this? That’s because you’ve started to notice the changes and you’re scared of coming off as desperate but you decide to text anyway. Really getting attached to people is not a funny scenario to behold. Let’s not digress; we’d get to that soon. So after sending the ‘’hey’’ message, you wait for about 15 minutes and you begin to hate yourself for bothering in the first place. And you begin to think to yourself that this was the same person who took less than 2 minutes to reply your messages. While on that thought, your phone vibrates and you really hope they’re the one, but all you see is one annoying text from MTN -_- . See how needy you look just by sending a three-letter word to someone you used to talk to for hours, sad? I know right but that’s life. On the other hand this person you want to talk to so bad has read your message but doesn’t want to talk or even feel like talking to you, the more you persist, the begin to sense how needy you’ve become and that only pushes them farther away. They take a longer time than necessary to get back to you why? This because they got a taste of a better meal and they’re tired of you, ouch! Sorry but the truth had to be said. Wait let’s get something straight, I’m not saying they don’t want to talk to you just because they took hours to reply your message just once. Some people might actually be busy but if this is always the case then you know you’re part of the chain. The person finally gets back to you after about an hour and maybe you’re half asleep, your phone vibrates and your eyes pops open like you saw the bright light at the end of tunnel, you finally read the message and all you see is one cold hi? Lol and you didn’t even chill for a bit, like 10 minutes to reply? You just go ahead to reply in two seconds???!!! Really -_- Smh. And the irony of it all of is the other person is also waiting on someone else’s text message to come in, look they’re not even thinking about you and getting your own message would only annoy them because it’s not from the person they want to talk to. See how they’re also part of the chain? Lol and this other person they’re dying to talk to is also waiting on someone else and it goes on and on. I’m not saying everyone is part of a needy chain; all I’m trying to say is when you notice someone begins to act differently to you, don’t just sit there and try to fix things. I’m not saying you should dump your friendships/ relationships when something goes wrong, try to make things right, yes fight for what you have but make sure you’re not the only one who’s fighting. If you are move on because the harder you try the farther you push them away. It’s not easy but you can do all things, not ‘’some’’ things, ALL things through Christ that strengthens you. Do not place your happiness in people or on things, because once those things/people are gone, your happiness goes with it. The whole process starts with becoming attached. We have to be careful of who and what we let get to our hearts. Keep your heart with all diligence for out of it springs the issues of life (proverbs 4:23). See even the bible tells us to Guide our hearts, meaning don’t just let anything get past it, don’t just let anyone in. You might feel as if you do not matter to that person but who cares anyways when there’s someone out there who cares too much about you, He even died for you. You can never come off as needy to Jesus because He’s all you need and I’m sure He knows that, so focus on him, stop trying to get people to accept you, really just stop. Break off that chain today and be set free from every form of neediness. Jesus loves you, be happy 🙂 .